Senses

November 3, 2020 8:12am

I awaken to the realization that our lives are nothing more than sensations that we experience. All that we know and remember, we acquire through our five senses. What we see, hear, touch, smell, and taste makes up our “life.” No this is not true…..or is it? I’ve never “sensed” God physically yet a significant portion of my thoughts during my life have been devoted to thinking about this concept. So how did I know about God or atoms or electromagnetism? First we hear about these things from others (a secondary source)? And then, perhaps, we see effects we assign to the thing. Anyway, our lives are all about sensations – their remembrance, or the anticipation of more. This seems insignificant….only a shadow life – compared to the lives we thought we were leading.

Lying in bed on a cloudy November morning and considering these things, I hear geese honking as they fly over the house. If I were outside, I would here the wind rustling their feathers with that “grunting” sound you hear when they fly very low…..and I think there is some beauty associated with the limited physical sensations that we enjoy!

I would reach a little further than this monochrome palette though and seek to experience existence through some other means but I don’t know what it is or how to begin. Maybe that’s what many of us spend our lives on…..this futile search to go beyond what is possible.

Election

November 3, 2020 8:13pm

Regardless of who wins, the American people will be the losers. I see government as a necessary evil that should have a very limited role in our lives. I’d rather have crooked capitalists running things than government….at least I can opt out of corporate America. If government gets involved, you have three possibilities: submit, go to jail, die. There is no escape from government.

Beasts Around the Bed

November 4, 2020 6:05am

I awake at 5:30 to a profound darkness and a silence so deep it is a loud buzzing of insects trying to enter. I will not go back to sleep and understand I’m now on my own to face those eternal questions: who am I, where did I come from, where am I going.

I cry out to God for answers and like Quasimodo, I plead, “why?” But there is no response from God or the cosmos and I curl into a fetal position the better to protect myself from the beasts that wander around the bed. Their roars are deafening and they wait patiently for any chance to disable me, to bring me to my knees, I see then the teeth in the soft throat. The fangs punctuating colon of the living blood of the carotid and jugular. There is silence as this scene plays in my mind and those tubes hang out of the throat that once bore food and air to a pitiful creature who never figured out why it existed – a sacrifice to the uncaring universe conducted by those priests of sin so dedicated to their rites, chants, and phylacteries. Now the bones of the condemned are bleached in the sun and saved as a lesson to others. If you seek the eternal, if you search for meaning, if you reach up from the mire, this is your fate. Give up, resign yourself to the original sin – and others you made up along the way. You cannot be other than you are. The universe cannot be other than it is.

Perfidious Americans – Operation Northwoods

November 5, 2020 10:15am

On March 15, 1962, the Department of Defense and the Joint Chiefs of Staff, signed off on a plan for the CIA and other agencies to commit acts of terrorism against AMERICAN MILITARY AND *CIVILIAN* targets to gain support for a war against Cuba. President Kennedy rejected this plan and the Chairman of the Joint Chiefs, Lyman Limnitzer was subsequently denied reappointment.

The fact that such a plan was even considered is a testament to the treachery of our leaders. How many covert operations have been conducted in the name of the American people? How many of these operations were targeting our own citizens? We will never know.

Now read “War is a Racket” by General Smedley Butler to get a better idea of the deception and the misuse of the US military for the profit of the few.

Gird Up Thy Loins

November 5, 2020 6:49pm

Following dinner, I retired outdoors to a comfortable chair with a pumpkin ale and Fernando Pessoa for an exquisite autumn evening of reading. Twilight settled upon the scene and, laying the book aside, I wandered the path around the back field. If only I could believe in one true thing, I might have strength to continue but faith in anything fails me and I retreat back to the chair for more Pessoa who is a connection to something eternal. I searched diligently for the eternal-infinite but it was hidden.

I would have sympathy for my fellow travelers but they are as tainted as me and my concern turns to revulsion. Who are these who say they are my tribe? Shamans of some hallucinogenic religion? They imagine they are alive and immerse themselves in rituals with no meaning, rites of passage to nowhere, ceremonies marking negative integers of infinity, exponents of logarithmic scales of nihilism, and megatons of mathematic nothingness. You may scream for meaning and ask yourself, “why did this happen to me.” A better question is why shouldn’t it? Were you unique among the billions? Were you somehow special?

God will speak to you from a whirlwind and say, “Who is this that darkeneth counsel by words without knowledge. Gird up thy loins; I will demand of thee and answer thou me. Where wast thou when I laid the foundations of the Earth? Declare if thou hast understanding.” Job Ch. 38.

And poor maggot that you are, you will have no answer – no response. God will wait for all eternity and you are mute. Unspeaking, you will cower before the immensity of time, space, and fate. The Moirai, who hold all of creation in their hands and who control even the Gods, will decide how you will exit existence – they alone.