Lonely Universe and….Corn
July 10, 2018
It would seem that loneliness is endemic. When you consider our lives and the unbelievably slow pace of our existence, is it any wonder? I like movies that emphasize the quiet, alone times we all must face. It makes up a large portion of our lives…. too much time to think, maybe? And perhaps that’s why we have an opioid epidemic in this country; people just can’t face reality.
The observable, known universe is about 92 billion light years in diameter. In that space, astronomers estimate that there are one trillion galaxies – each with approximately 100 billion to 400 billion stars. With that many chances for a planet supporting life, it’s easy to understand the Fermi paradox – he asked, “where are they?” The aliens. They must exist – why have we not seen them?
I have 13 days before retirement. My sense of alienation abides. I’ve always been afflicted with this feeling that I don’t belong here – that something is wrong. I managed to ignore it for a long time but now it is back.
I have a garden; in the garden is corn. The racoons like the corn as well as we do. So, I trap the racoons.
Unreasonable Expectations
and Irreconcilable Conflicts
July 12, 2018
The land of unreasonable expectations is a region of stark contrasts between the conceivable and the real. The degree to which we inhabit that land is a measure of our happiness…. whatever that is.
Every day, multitudes of people sleepwalk through life with a portion of their consciousness in the land of unreasonable expectations and another portion in the house of pain because of their awareness of the irreconcilable conflicts of the soul.
I stumbled up on the work of author Shlomo Kato today. He wrote a book called “Lili” which sounds like it could be similar to “Night Train to Lisbon.” Kato reports that in 1969, he underwent a life changing event that affected him, his thoughts, and writing for the rest of his life. He wrote: “First Sunday of the year 1969AD, 12 noon. Body tensed like a bow string. Not he. Warmth rising from the region of the heart. Not he. He stopped being what he was. He will no longer be as he was forever and ever….”
Reminds me a little of Pascal’s vision. The “not he” remarks are particularly interesting. What does it mean? What did he experience? These mystical experiences are intriguing.
My own came in a pickup truck in the middle of the night on North Ridge Farm. I was working as a night watchman on this thoroughbred horse farm. While contemplating life, God, and the future, I was filled with a sense of the greatest peace I’ve ever experienced. I didn’t hear a voice but had this feeling that someone was reassuring me that all was right with the universe, that it was all going according to plan. I lay there in the dark experiencing this profoundly serene feeling for 20-30 minutes….and then it was gone. I never experienced this again.