Impeachment

February 6, 2020

Trump acquitted today….half the population is celebrating, half is despondent.

I feel like a man who thinks he is about to be washed up on a beach after being lost at sea. But each time I get close, the waves carry me back into deep water. No matter how hard I struggle, I cannot make it to shore. This is my fate – to languish here in sight of dry land but never to drag my sorry ass out of the surf.

I finished “Surprised by Joy” and think I should be able to arrive at a similar conclusion but then I realize that just because I wish something does not mean that it will happen, that the world really works that way. And once again I drift further from safety.

Where is the evidence, the rationale – other than in my heart?

Heart of Darkness

February 14, 2020

Everything seems to come back to the supremacy of the ego. Anything that threatens ego threatens the meaning of life. This is an interesting phenomenon. I’m reading Conrad’s “Heart of Darkness.” The first half is very good….I would say on the order of Woolf, Proust, or Tolstoy. Now into a section that is not as good.